Consiquence

(Photo Description: A black and white selfie of Codee looking to the left.)

I’ve read so many Twitter and Facebook posts about Covid, the lockdown and quarentine rules and how people feel about it that I’m sometimes finding it hard not to react and share my own opinions and feelings. Instead, I’ve decided I want to tell you a story.

There once was a lady who went to school one afternoon to pick up her children. While she was waiting, she had a conversation with a father who was also waiting for his child. A great conversation, with some coughing and sneezing in between as the man had a cold.

The next day, the lady woke up and discovered she also had a cold. However, this cold came with a rash and she quickly discovered she had German Measles.

A couple of weeks later, there was good news. The lady learned that she was expecting a baby. Her and her husband happily made all the preparations necessary before welcoming their baby to the world. The baby however, had no plans to wait full term before joining the world. 6 weeks early, the lady became proud mother of a baby girl.

Unfortunately the girl had medical problems. She suffered a heart attack a couple hours after birth and was whisked away to surgery. This surgery didn’t go without complications. The baby almost didn’t make it and doctors had to fight to bring her back to life. Luckily they won the fight and after several weeks in the NICU, mother and father took baby home.

At 6 months, baby’s grandmother noticed that baby wasn’t using her eyes to follow the toy that grandma was showing her. So mother and father took their baby to a doctor. The doctor said that baby had cataracts and would need surgery to remove them. Although this surgery went well, doctor was very puzzled. Why did baby have heart problems at birth and now cataracts? ‘Of course!’ Said the doctor suddenly. This baby has the symptoms of Congenital Rubella Syndrome. Doctor asked mother if she was sick during her pregnancy. Mother said that she had German Measles shortly before realising she was pregnant. She must have caught it from the father that she had a conversation with while waiting on her children at school that day. He had mild symptoms and thought it was just a cold. He was so wrong.

Now that baby’s difficult start in life made sense, doctors were able to make sure she stayed as healthy as she could possibly be. However, she would grow up with challenges. Removing the cataracts didn’t restore her eyesight as the Rubella virus had damaged her retinas. So she would be visually impaired her whole life and eventually would lose even more eyesight. It wasn’t only the heart muscle affected. Other muscles were also weak. Causing urine incontinence and balance and co-ordination issues which resulted in her needing a wheelchair just after she turned 21. She also learned that she had hearing loss and diabetes along with many other small issues and health problems.

That lady, the one that was sick with German Measles and later realised she was pregnant, that was my mother. The man who thought he only had a cold, was a friend that my mom saw at school frequently. So the baby… that’s me.

There’s a vaccine for German Measles/Rubella. However it wasn’t available until 1974. By this time both my mom and the friend from school were adults. Mom had received a Measles vaccine when she was younger. When the Rubella vaccine became available, mom thought she’d already had it as Rubella was referred to as German Measles. Same thing, she thought. So no vaccination required, she thought. I don’t know why the man at school wasn’t vaccinated. It could be possible that he thought the same thing as my mom. I guess I will never know.

I am a consiquence of two people who didn’t get vaccines that they needed. Well, ok. My disability and health issues are a consiquence of not being vaccinated. I’m not 100% sure how my mother felt about this. We didn’t talk about it often. However, I met the friend from school when I was about 13 years old. I shook his hand. After which he walked away, almost crying. He feels responsible and guilty for what happened. Though I personally don’t blame him for anything. The past is the past and I’m proud to be me. My disabilities are part of me, but they don’t make me who I am.

One of the issues with having Congenital Rubella Syndrome is that you never know how other illnesses are going to affect you. In March 2020 I was sick for 8 weeks with what we think was Covid. Since then my immune system took a nose dive. I’ve been sitting at home for 10 months. The only other walls I’ve seen apart from those in my own house, are those of doctors offices, hospitals and rehab facilities. Our country hasn’t been in lockdown forever. In the summer we were quite free to go out and get coffee, or stuff we needed from a shop or supermarket. At that time I chose not to. Now that winter is here, even stepping outside for a moment to bring trash away, triggers a coughing fit or asthma attack because it’s so cold. So now I don’t have a choice. Not if I don’t want to get sicker.

Although we think I’ve had Covid, we can’t know for sure. So I also choose to follow all the rules the government impliments. Not only for my own safety, but also for the safety of others. Having CRS means I can be sick with anything at any time and not know. I don’t want to be like that man, that friend from school who feels guilty because going out with what might be a cold, turns into somebody else getting sick, or worse.

We all have feelings and opinions on Covid and I don’t want to influence anyone by saying what I think you should or shouldn’t do. I respect your feelings, opinions and choices. I hope that this story has given you some insight into why I make my own choices and hope it helps those who feel alone at this time due to being in lockdown or quanentine.

Remember it’s ok to not be ok and while other’s feelings and opinions may be different to yours, it’s still important to talk and it’s even more important to listen.